Who Am I?

Anxiety can feel like an invisible storm inside your mind, making everyday moments overwhelming. Personally, I have found it very helpful to write things down.

They never tell you that life is mostly adjustment.

Bending. Shrinking.

Softening sharp edges to fit inside rooms that were never built with you in mind.

No one teaches you which part of yourself will be applauded and which parts

will make people uncomfortable.

In one place,

you are "too emotional" in another, too cold.

Too loud for leadership.

Too opinionated for love.

Too independent for some men,

too dependent for others.

Every version of you

is wrong to somebody.

And the cruelest part

is that people hand you the rules

only after you break them.

Stand up for yourself -

but not here.

Speak honestly -

but not now.

Be strong -

but only in ways

that don't inconvenience anyone else.

So you learn how to swallow yourself whole.

How to nod politely.

How to turn your anger into silence

and your silence into exhaustion.

And eventually

you become a collection of edited personalities,

tailored responses, carefully measured reactions.

A thousand different masks

for a thousand different rooms.

Until someone smiles and says,

"Just be yourself."

and all you can think is,

"Who?"

~Written by: Ash